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Questions That Have No
Good Answers
1. If
you take an Oriental person and spin them around several
times, do they become disoriented?
2. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people
from Holland called Holes?
3. Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack?
4. If musicians make music and magicians make magic, do
physicians make physics?
5. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
6. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
7. When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts" and
you put your two cents in . . . what happens to the other
penny?
8. Why is the man who invests all your money called a
broker?
9. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they
just stale bread to begin with?
10. When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
11. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but
a person who drives a race car not called a racist?
12. Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
13. Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
14. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety-one?
15. "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the
English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest
sentence?
16. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked,
doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted,
musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree
surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
17. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed
UP?
18. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
19. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of
bald men?
20. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a
whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . .
they're cramming for their final exam.
21. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny
little spoons and forks so I wondered what do Oriental
mothers use? Toothpicks?
22. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post
Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't
they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the
mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?
23. If it's true that we are here to help others, then what
exactly are the others here for?
24. You never really learn to swear until you learn to
drive.
25. No one ever says, "It's only a game" when their team is
winning
26. Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it
didn't zigzag?
27. Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime
next door went nuts.
28. If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
29. Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?
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