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More Bad
Puns
My first job was
working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned,
couldn't concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a
lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the
axe. After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just
wasn't suited for it. Mainly because it was a so-so job.
Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was
exhausting. I wanted to be a barber, but I just
couldn't cut it. Then I tried to be a chef--figured it
would add a little spice to my life but I just didn't have
the thyme. Finally, I attempted to be a deli worker,
but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.
My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I
wasn't noteworthy. I studied a long time to become a
doctor, but I didn't have any patients. Next was a job
in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in. I
became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I
couldn't live on my net income. Thought about becoming
a witch, so I tried that for a spell. I managed to get
a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the
work was just too draining. I got a job at a zoo
feeding giraffes but I was fired because I wasn't up to it.
So then I got a job in a gymnasium (work-out-center), but
they said I wasn't fit for the job. Next, I found
being an electrician interesting, but the work was shocking.
After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got
a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in
it. My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to
quit because it was always the same old grind.
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